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We spent most of the holidays in a mad rush. It always seems to happen that way, despite our best efforts to try to relax the whole routine. I end up making Christmas cards (which almost always end up being sent late) and some few presents get made by hand, and then there's all the shopping for gifts, wrapping, mailing and all that other stuff that eats time and makes life more frenetic around Christmas. I end up stressed out, running around in circles like a crazed animal (my favorite phrase these days because it seems to apply to everything the boys and I do). You'd think I'd learn.

We almost always end up driving all over due to having family scattered all over the state. And California is a big place. Fortunately the boys are really very good at travelling for long distances in the car, so it makes the drives much more bearable. This year we only drove to Los Angeles and back (300+ miles each way) for a few days during the week between Christmas and New Years. And despite not having lots of plans for while we were down there, we ended up so busy with family stuff that I didn't get any of the other stuff done that I'd hoped. What a surprise.

The boys did get to go to the beach while we were there, since all of the various Kwinns live so close to the beach around Playa del Rey. I took them several times while we were there; great for running with nobody yelling at them to stop, put that down, don't do that, don't go there, knock it off... If we lived closer to a beach up here I think we'd go almost every day; it's so free and open and it sure relaxes me. There's something about those waves that really makes you slow down a bit and realize all of those urgent things aren't really that important, anyway.

Beaches in December... the air was cool, and the water was certainly cold, but there were plenty of surfers in wetsuits braving the waves anyway. In Southern California wetsuits for surfing aren't a year round necessity like they are up here in Northern California. Nothing like cute young guys in skintight wetsuits to make you simultaneously appreciate the scenery and be painfully aware of your own unwanted bumps and bulges. Casey and Riley were fascinated with the surfers getting ready to go in the water; the big boards, the friendly guys in dark shiny suits, watching them run and leap fearlessly into the water. I could just see the two of them as blond surfer dudes if we lived nearer to the waves. Seems like it'd be a pretty happy way to spend time to me.

So I've given the boys their first real haircuts. I had a hard time steeling myself to do it, but I've gone and cut off all those cute blond curls at the back of their necks. Casey kept getting mistaken for a girl, and while that'll probably still happen with his little round face, big brown eyes and cherubic mouth, at least he won't have long hair to add to the effect. It took so long for them to get that hair that it was painful to cut it off! Almost two years old and finally more hair than they needed. Every day almost has some sort of milestone.

Now that I've put the boys in daycare two mornings a week (which they're still adjusting to), theoretically I'll have more time to actually get productive artistically again. Hasn't happened so far, though I'm hopeful that I'll slowly catch up on stuff and get to the point where I can ruthlessly schedule in art time during those precious few free hours. It's so hard to focus when there's so much stuff around you demanding to be done-- distractions being one of those big huge pitfalls of being self-employed and working in your own home studio area. Unfortunately my art area is also in our big main living area space, so it's even harder than going into a smaller room and just closing the door. Focus, focus!

Also have to face the rueful realization that I _must_ get glasses for up close detail work and reading; since being pregnant with the boys I've noticed my close-up vision has gone further and further away; that is, I need longer arms to hold things in focus so I can read them! Everyone who's always had glasses snorts at me in disgust when I whine about this, but for me it's one of those unpleasant milestones that happens when you get older that you'd rather do without. I used to have better than 20/20 vision; and here I am now realizing I can't see to draw a straight line. Sigh. Maybe it'll help me loosen up with the drawings!

I can't wait for the boys to really start talking; it seems like they've been perched on the verge of talking for months now, but we keep waiting for more words to come tumbling out. I keep getting told that it's a combination of being boys and being twins, but they're running somewhat late with the whole concept of talking. Several friends' singleton girl babies are already talking up a storm, which tends to make me both jealous and insecure; what am I doing wrong? I must not chatter to them enough, I must not interact with them enough on a one-to-one basis, I'm a lousy mom who doesn't try hard enough, blah blahblah. But some of the other twin moms tend to put things into perspective for me, which helps immensely. Nothing like having some pals with twins the same age who aren't talking either.

Hope y'all had good holidays. We did, though it all rushed by much too quickly, and the few moments where we could really relax and savor the moments were just that-- moments. I never make New Year's Resolutions since I can never seem to keep them, but I do hope to really slow down a bit this next year and realize when it's time to stop, relax and just enjoy being alive.